Just Write: On 9/11.

He asks me if I saw it in the newspaper or how did I even know about September 11.

And I realize how far removed he is, even at 12, when it seems they've talked and talked and talked about what this day means.

I tell him I saw it all day long and he looks at me shocked.

I've been all close to tears for days now. The start of kindergarten. The 5K. This overwhelming life feeling. The tears have been awaiting. Each Facebook post or blog post in my reader I read the tears seem closer on this day because I remember.

I tell him I was in anatomy class and there was a knock on the door.

I notice that now not just T is listening but M and H are mesmerized.

My professor, Dr. Nelson, walked to the door and came back a few moments later. "All tall buildings in Chicago are being evacuated. There has been a terrorist attack at the World Trade Center."

With that class was dismissed and I walked across campus with my lab partner and friend, EJ. "What's a terrorist?" I asked him.

I wasn't even 20 yet, I'd never heard the word terrorist and here I am, in my kitchen, explaining terrorism to my children.

I am digging in the fridge now because I am fearful that if I look at them the tears will come and I wish J were here so he could tell them about this instead of me.

I don't tell them any more of the day though I remember the day perfectly. I didn't quite know what it all meant, the depth of the attacks didn't hit me until later. Peter Jennings and flags hung proudly throughout downtown Chicago, class discussions and phone calls home.

And my dad, was stranded, in Colorado, or Utah, or something. And at a time where Americans didn't know who to trust, he could trust a stranger he met in the airport and they rented a car and drove to Minnesota.

I don't tell the kids any of this. I think it. I come back to the conversation.

On this day, ten years ago, a bad man asked some not very good people decided to crash planes into buildings to hurt people. A lot of people died.

T and M are somber because this is nothing new, they have talked about it, read about it, heard about it. But I don't think they knew I lived then and knew it.

I am scared as I talk that I am scaring H.

So today, I say, we remember those who died and we pray for their families and we thank all those soldiers and police men and fire men for protecting us and keeping us safe.

And it will never happen again.

Sharing my thoughts on 9/11 and linking up to Just Write over on The Extraordinary Ordinary today. An exercise in freely writing, no editing.