Little One of Mine.

Sometimes I wonder what really goes through his little mind.

I bet he's got questions up the wazoo.

How come daddy goes to work a lot?

How in the world do those voices get inside the phone?

Why T and M sometimes disappear for a few days at a time?

Why can't I go on that big yellow bus? I promise I'll behave.

He is curious and busy and doesn't stop moving until he's asleep.

Since school started he's been more active. Or maybe he's not more active.

Maybe it's that I notice it more now.

Now that the other two are in school ALL day, and now that I'm working two days.

Maybe it just seems that he doesn't have people to chase as much. And in the days I'm home now I'm trying to get more accomplished.

I wish I wasn't. Accomplish less, sit on the floor more is what I wish my motto was.

He's started having some seperation anxiety. Crying and screaming, the moment that Babysitter Girl arrives.

He knows that her coming over symbolizes me leaving.

I hate that. But I know it's normal.

A quick goodbye and departure is usually in order.

But that feeling I get when I walk in the door after school is priceless.

His smile is full from ear to ear. His high pitched squeel of excitement.

The arms wrapped tight around my neck and the head on my shoulder hug.

I think it's those moments that make me realize why I love having a job, or commitments outside of this house.

It's those moments I understand what's going on in his little mind perfectly.

It's realizing that I am loved, missed and important.

Things I know anyway but sometimes just need to feel.

It's hearing his heart say, I missed you mom and I'm glad you're home.

Will you play with me?

Something I know anyway but just need to feel.