Conversations With My Kid-Video Edition

This post will be linked up to Conversations with my Kid at Moms without Blogs.

Never Say Never.

He's been wanting a cell phone of his own for longer than I can even remember now.

Honestly, I've laughed it off more than once. Asking what he needs a cell phone for.

Made no sense to me.

People bring up safety and it baffles me. Cause he's 11. And where does he go that he needs a phone?

So last week when J and I were talking and our conversation soon landed on a cell phone for T. I even surprised myself as I found myself nodding and going along with this plan. T would be getting his own phone with certain parameters. We'd write a contract.

And he'd be paying his {minimal} portion of the bill with his money earned from his brand-new lawn mowing business.

Sunday afternoon after church, J surprised T by taking him to the cell phone store. T was clueless and shocked when J told the sales guy that he wanted to add a line to our account for T.

And Sunday night the relationship between him and I took a turn for better as he asked me to show him the ropes of his new phone. (He chose the same phone that I have.)

And we texted back and forth and figured out how to save the numbers in the address book and how to take a picture.

He is so happy. So happy that we have trusted him and given him this big, big responsibility.

I'm learning that sometimes in order to teach responsibility, we need to create opportunities for him to learn it.

So, we drew up a contract, including:

*When payment is due.

*What happens if payment is not made. Or an overage in minutes. {He has 200 and unlimited texting.}

*That the phone can be taken away at any time, for any reason including: disrespectful behavior, poor grades....

*Phone is turned off and on the charger at 8:30pm school nights and 10pm weekend nights both here and at his moms.

*The phone is not used during school, church, baseball practice etc.

*Only giving his number out to people he knows.

*Texts and phone call history can be checked at any time. Only appropriate texts and pictures taken, sent and received.

*He is solely responsible for the phone and if anything happens to it, it's still his responsibility to pay the monthly bill and replace.

Do I think he needs a cell phone?

No. But do any of us really, truly, need a cell phone.

Do I think that it will be helpful and useful as he gets older and spends more time with friends?

Oh yes, absolutely.

Is so very nice to be able to call him on his cell phone instead of traipsing through the neighborhood with two overtired, hungry littles telling him it's time to come in for dinner.

I think it's going to be a good thing and I can't even believe I'm saying that because if you'd asked me just a couple months ago I would have said never.

Which is why I am trying to live by that old mantra of; never say never.

Two Wheels.

We are working on starting and stopping.

And turning too.

But wow, just wow, my little boy now rides a two-wheeler.

For a video with J's fabulous commentary (and a couple spills to boot) go here.

Tomorrow.

One of those days today.

Where I do want to relish in today but really just can't wait to wake up tomorrow and start over.

I'll spare you the details.

My kids, amazingly enough, were perfect today.

No exaggeration, perfect.

All four of them.

It's really too bad I don't play the lottery, this could mean something!

But no, it was just one of those off, icky feeling, sort of sensitive, unintentional days.

Not my favorite kind of days. Where the mole hills turn to mountains and I start thinking of all the things I'm not doing such a good job of and all the things others are doing that just irk me.

But like the turn of a page, my day turned around with a trip to the park.

It was overcast and a little bit chilly so we had the park to ourselves.

Where I watched T play basketball and show off his new cell phone. Yes, we did what we said we'd never do and got our 11 year old a cell phone. Can I tell you about it another day?

And I watched M and her sweet little friend Mary play restaurant with woodchips serving H and E make believe dishes.

H, wants so badly to be big. He figured out the firemans pole today.

And E, she smiled and she slid and she swang and she laughed.

With the turn of a page, a flip of a switch, my day turned around.

It didn't hurt that just as we were about to leave two tween-friends of T's walked over and one asked me if I was T's "hot" stepmom.

Don't worry. I told him that as far as I know, I'm his only stepmom.

Still thankful for tomorrow.

Can you relate?

This.

H got a three piece Spiderman pajama set for his birthday from a friend that we exchanged for a bigger size today. So he promptly took off his clothes and was in the tank and shorts and thought it was hilarious for E to wear the shirt, just like a nightgown.

And then they laughed and ran and captured each other, all afternoon long.

Playing Spiderman, of course.

This is my dream, my wish. My prayer. Come true.

Oh, my littles, won't you please, remember this?

Gummy Bears.

When J's alarm went off at 5am this morning, he noticed that H's bedroom light was on. Sure enough, H was up playing already.

J also noted that the fridge and snack cupboard were open along with the jar of gummy bears that sits atop the counter.

The lid was replaced. The cupboard and fridge closed and J went about getting ready for work.

Shortly after J got into the shower, H came into bed with me.

Me, not knowing that he's been up for who knows how long.

"Mama, does Evie like gummy bears?" He asked sweetly.

Half asleep I wasn't sure why he'd be asking but I just said I don't know right now.

He laid still next to me besides a random giggle here and there.

This should have been a clue that something was not right.

As soon as we heard E talking in her crib he was ready for her to join us. With J still home I got E and brought her out to eat breakfast, grabbing H some dry cereal so he could watch some cartoons while I took a shower and got ready for the day.

I was about to walk into the bathroom and then noticed that his bowl that had had Fruity Cheerios was now full of gummy bears.

"Where did these come from?" I asked knowing that J was in the kitchen with E so there was no way he would have given them to him.

"I just had them." He told me. I took them away and dumping them in a bowl and told him that he needs to ask first.

Shortly after my shower and H's cartoon time, J left for work and H sat at the kitchen table refusing to eat breakfast.

"I'm not hungry." He whined. Repeatedly.

I finally allowed him to be finished with the understanding that he would not have any snacks or anything to eat until lunch.

He was supposed to be getting dressed when I walked into the living room and found him sprawled on the couch with one leg out of his footy superhero pajamas.

And in the foot part of the pajamas he had gummy bears. A million gummy bears.

He was throwing them into his mouth as quick as he could before I could take them.

I was fuming.

Now we've had this jar of gummies for a couple months now on the counter. It has not been a problem. Until now.

"Do you have anymore?" I asked as I filled the bowl.

"No." He said.

I looked at him and told him that if he had more and wasn't telling me that he would be in trouble but if he has more and just tells me I won't be mad.

"I don't have anymore." He said.

And silly old me, I believed him.

Because about 10 minutes later when he was supposedly getting dressed for real, I caught him eating the gummy bears out of the other foot of his footy pajamas!

Ahh!

It's funny now. It is.

His idea to hide gummy bears in the feet of his pajamas is pretty inventive and brilliant. Though also disgusting.

But he was still in trouble.

And that jar of gummy bears. It may be relocating if we don't get a handle on this.

Finally, just so you know. He had no snacks all morning. And survived.

He just ate lunch.

Like a champ.

Earth Day.

Happy Earth Day! Just curious, how do YOU celebrate earth day?

The Superhero Party!

There was a time, not so long ago, where I really wanted to be a party and event planner. I researched, I planned, I applied for positions. I even contemplated starting my very own business.

It never came through and I'm resolved with that because it leaves me free to plan the parties and special things that are most important to me.

Like H's 4th birthday this past weekend.

Most people don't throw birthday parties at home anymore. And there's a surplus of places out there where they will do all the work for you and you just write the check and walk away. I admit there have been a few parties we've done just that but if you look at the last few years of our life you'd understand why.

I have been working on H's party for the last couple months. No joke! I wanted to have an affordable, memorable, fun party at home that was all about superheroes! I worked my tail off and it paid! I couldn't be happier with how the party turned out and just how happy and excited my brand new four year old was.

So without further explanation, this is the long photo/link recap of the festivities. Enjoy!

The invite design was done by: Mommies Ink .

Printed at Costco.

Cupcake toppers were made by me with basic colored cardstock, toothpicks and a digital file purchased from: Kottage on 5th and once again printed at Costco.

Pinata candy bags were made with plain paper lunch bags and the cupcake toppers minus the toothpick.

Birthay shirt from Little One Boutique.

The banner was made by me. I had looked and looked and looked at these banners on etsy and knew that if I took the time I could make one. So I did. Used regular primary colored cardstock, cut out letters with a diecut machine at my local Archivers store and purchased some superhero scrapbooking paper and star ribbon at JoAnn Fabrics. Total cost for me to make this: $5 using supplies I already owned. So worth it. I absolutely love it!

"Batman pb&j's"

I used a bat cookie cutter I purchased after Halloween last year to cut out the sandwiches. Perfect size sandwiches for 3-4 year olds at a party!

"Superstrength veggies"

"Green Goblin grapes"

"Spiderman web pretzels"

"Superhero Superpower juiceboxes"

My homemade pin the batwings on the Batman game!

Pinata!

The big party surprise was SUPERMAN!

We borrowed the costume from a friend and had a friend of a friend dress up and surprise the kids! It was hands down my favorite part of the party!

Party favors. Every child went home with their very own superhero cape and mask with their initial on it. Superman brought these with him to hand out! Purchased from: Custom Kids.
H's cape is reversible and this is the other side.

All in all the party was a great success! And I'm already dreaming up next year's!

Please feel free to use any of my ideas and browse any of the shops I have listed. I do ask that if you use any of my own ideas that you would give me credit by linking back here. Thank you!

Disclosure: I was not paid or compensated in any way to share the etsy sellers that I purchased items from. I paid for these items on my own. However one seller did give me a discount.

Four.

While six years ago today J made me a wife and T and M made me a parent.

Four years ago today, H made me a mama.

H and Superman on his last day of being 3.

Today he is four. And if only I could describe the amount of love and joy that boy gives me.

I was born to be his mama.

It's no secret how I feel.

I love him. To the moon. Where the aliens live. And back. More than words could ever say.

Happy 4th Birthday, sweet boy!

More to come when we're done celebrating both our marriage and our new four year old.

Six Years.

Our anniversary typically gets trumped by a certain little persons birthday. {April 17.}

And that's ok. We love celebrating him, we do.

But because he wouldn't be here without the celebration of us, today, I'm celebrating and congratulating us.

April 17, 2004.

You don't have to take my word for it but statistically speaking a marriage like ours is beating the odds.

Some say a marriage like ours was/is destined to fail.

You have to know, a divorced father marrying a young never married woman, adding in more children, the numbers certainly aren't in our favor.

They never have been.

But we have risen to the challenge, each and every single day.

Six very full years have been ours.

And we aren't anywhere near over anytime soon.

Make that ever.

We are committed to each other and this family. Forever.

More in love and happy to be married to J than the day I said I do.

Happy Anniversary to us! I love you, J!

True love stories never have endings. ~Richard Bach

What You Know. And What Inspires You.

I have loved reading the comments of what you know.

Perhaps I am using an overused conundrum when I say this but I'll say it anyway. I was inspired. Yes, inspired by the many words!

What words you live by and stand by and when the going gets tough, you recite or you remember or you hear just in the knick of time.

Sometimes I think it's these little things that inspire us, isn't it?

But for today, some of my favorites:

"Live like you mean it." {Suzi}

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." {Gloria quoting Maya Angelou}

"Don't leap before grace. Respond, don't react." {Heather}

"Live a life of love." {Adrianne quoting Ephesians 5:2}

"The days may be long, but the seasons are short." {Jen}

"Love your child for who they are, not who you want them to be". {Stacey} I love, love, love this! It is so very, very true!

"Never take to heart the opinions of people you don't respect." {Darcie}

If I could give away a book to each of you that commented or emailed me, I would. But there's just one to give away so I used my good old friend random.org to choose a winner.

Comment #5!

Luther Liz who wrote: "If you have a choice between laughing and getting mad, laugh."

Which was another one that I truly loved. I want to remember that in the heat of frustration and where I would want to get mad, laugh instead. I want to.

I'd love to hear from others who didn't post their thoughts. Though there is no longer a prize at stake, I still want to know. What do you know?

I also want to know, what inspires you?

I have a mile long list of things that inspire me lately. It seems a song plays at just the right moment and I am fixated and off in inspiration. I am working on composing some thoughts and sharing with you one of my newest favorite authors and the books she's creating that resonate with me. There's more. Like I said, a mile long list. More to come on this topic next week, the end of this week is a special time for our family and there is much to be done around here.

But in the meantime, what inspires you? Is it a book? a song? a friend or loved one? Your children's laughter?

Please share.

Our Skinny Picture of Health.

Yesterday was E's big weigh in!

I joked Sunday night that it was the opposite of the "Last Chance Workout" on The Biggest Loser. Trying to fatten our girl up has been quite the feat.

At her 15 month appointment she had weighed in at 19 lbs, 7 ounces with a diaper. Considering the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends babies to triple their birth weight by 12 months (and she was born at a whopping 8 lbs 4 ounces) she was significantly underweight falling into the 5th percentile.

So on top of a new and improved dairy, peanut and egg free diet we also have been working on finding ways to increase her body weight. Last week we had our mandatory appointment with the dietician who told us that we were feeding her great things but she wasn't getting enough calories. So we are working on feeding her the fattier, more substantial parts of meals before adding fruit, veggies and soy milk. All things she had been filling up on in the past and then not eating the bigger part. She suggested cooking her foods in oil and even resorting to some Mickey D's therapy. So yes, I am admitting publicly that Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday, she had a McDonalds hamburger for a meal. Doctors orders!

So yesterday I stripped down my babe and placed her on the scale and watched the numbers teeter. The dietician said that the minimum recommendation for weight gain for a child her age is 8 ounces in a month. She said Monday's weigh in would be five weeks after her last weigh in and if we didn't see a weight gain of 8 ounces, we would be needing to make some more serious and drastic changes.

So when the numbers on the scale stopped at 19 pounds, 15 ounces, I didn't hold back at all from shouting; "Hurray!! You did it Evie!"

And then; "Thank you God!"

The nurse had tears because she has been our nurse on many of our weekly, sometimes bi-weekly visits. And she has been the one not just once, but twice now to mummify and draw the excessive vials ofr blood for testing. She knows that Miss E is our beautiful enigma of a child and she is seriously in love with her smile!

We were still smiling when our pediatrician came in with E's overflowing chart in hand. He was too.

He looked her over head to toe and reported that one tube is gone and the whole in her eardrum has already almost completely closed up.

We won't be getting tubes again because in the last seven weeks E has had just one ear infection. Just one! That is a record for her. Since changing her diet her ears have improved ten-fold.

While her pediatrician doesn't believe her dairy allergy caused her ear issues, he does believe that it helped inflame her eustachian tubes causing infections to happen more frequently than they should. Being dairy free will not completely eliminate the infections but has already proven to help minimize them.

I believe this wholeheartedly!

She also walks now. Which relates back to her ear issues because of her equilibrium being off balance so often.

It is funny how all the pieces of Miss E and her health puzzle are coming together.

While it has finally been officially decided that she is dairy allergic and restricted from peanuts until she goes through skin tests at age 2, it's nice to have some answers. There is no reason to believe she is egg allergic yet but we are still taking it slow. We will start trying hard boiled egg yolks slowly this week too.

She can outgrow this. And there is a big part of me that thinks she will as she starts packing on some more pounds. Making a diet change has been difficult, I won't pretend it hasn't been. She definitely misses herself some cheese and I miss the pure convenience of feeding her anything, anywhere. Meals and snacks are much more planned and prepared beforehand.

But it has been worth it.

"She is the picture of health." Our pediatrician said. "Well, a skinny picture of health."

Finally, please don't take this recap and E's story as medical advice. It is simply our experience, our pediatricians opinion coupled with my own research and beliefs about E and E's health. I am always happy to answer questions or further discuss via email.

Book Review & Giveaway: What I Know.

When the publisher contacted me, I knew, before the book even arrived that I would love it.

And love it, I do.

What I Know: Uncommon wisdom and universal truths from 10 year olds and 100 year olds.

"In life, the one thing you can control is your word"

"It's not about whether somebody will "be there" for you. It's all about whether you will "be there" for somebody else."

I love inspirational books full of honest quotes about life and living.

That is this book.

Roger Emerson Fishman travelled the country interviewing ten year olds and 100 year olds about life. And the wisdom they shared will inspire you. Make you laugh. Make you cry. And most of all leave you feeling hopeful.

It's the perfect book to gift to a new college grad about to embark on a new journey of life or to give to a friend struggling with a hard time.

I ripped the packaging open and pretty much devoured every ounce of life advice I read.

You will too.

Mr. Fishman is giving away a signed copy of his book to one of my blog readers and all you have to do is tell me; What do YOU know?

Share one piece of life wisdom or your own quote on life that you've learned from life experience. What is it that you would tell some fresh faced graduate or maybe your elders that you have learned along the way? What really matters and what doesn't?

It could be funny, or maybe it's serious. Maybe it's a regret you have or something you don't want to regret. Whatever it is, leave it here by Wednesday April 14th 8pm and a winner will be chosen.

I can't wait to read these responses.

So, what are you waiting for, what do YOU know?



Disclosure: I was NOT paid or compensated to post this review or host this giveaway. These words and opinions are mine. I was given my own complimentary signed copy of the book without obligation and the publisher is giving away another signed copy.

I Didn't.

I was tired. Burnt out from the day and just ready to unwind.

And believe it or not, my kids would NOT go to bed. Namely, E.

Who was laughing and talking for awhile and then crying. Then it was quiet and I made the mistake of peeking in her room and she sat in the center of her crib, baby in hand and smile on her face.

And I gave in. Though in that moment every part of me wanted to just walk away, I didn't. I picked up my girl and headed to that rocking chair.

I could have missed this. I could have quickly and quietly shut the door and walked away wishing, hoping, even praying that she's just lay down, roll over and go to sleep.

I could have missed those moments at the end up the day between awake and sleep, one last kiss and a tight squeeze.

But I didn't.

I am so glad.

Mean Parenting.

The look on her face when I asked her to put her clothes away was a killer.

The attitude oozed off of her like steam. And my patience wore thin.

"We always do chores." She complained and I started making a list in my mind of all the things I had done all day.

When she saw the stack of thank you notes at the table, I could see that I had really struck a nerve. But two weeks after the big party, they are overdue.

She sits at the table sighing and slumping and I am growing frustrated but remain quiet.

She finished the task and it's time for dinner and again I've struck out because she had no free time today between homework and putting clothes away and thank you notes. It seems I have stolen her day and it's all my fault.

Today it was the clothes but yesterday it was emptying the dishwasher. Two weeks ago, she says in a tone, it was sweeping the kitchen and remember that time you made me take out the recycling.

And don't even get me started on her friends. They don't do chores and if by chance they do, their parents pay them. Per chore. According to her that is.

I am in awe and completely miffed. Don't we all as parents think we had it much rougher and tougher than our kids do? And she's complaining?

My job, I told her, is to be your parent.

Chores are a part of this family. Sometimes that's putting your clothes away. Sometimes that's setting the table. Sometimes they're big. Sometimes they're small. But we all help each other here.

And someday we hope that these kids have picked up a thing or two about making their beds and picking up their rooms and when they've got their own places {something M tells us will never happen for her} they'll know how to take care of themselves.

Aren't we supposed to be teachers? Teaching them how to do these self-help and life skills, like chores?

I'd be game for allowance, but that's not what's being asked. I'm being asked for a handout.

Reward me. Praise me. Spoil me 'til your blue in the face.

I don't want to, I hear, all day long. Chores. Homework. Dentist/Doctor visits.

It's rough to be a kid these days.

She's finishing her thank you's and asks me a question. I know why she's asking and I'm pretty sure she knows the answer all the same. What do I think about her getting a present when she got her immunizations a couple weeks back at the doctor?

T laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And after I picked myself up off the floor, I told her that I think that there are hundreds and thousands of children in this world who don't have health care, who can't go to the doctor when they're sick, let alone when they are healthy. That there are children born with disease, such as in Africa and Aids that don't even have a chance at life.

That I think it's pretty ridiculous.

My present to my kids when they go to the doctor, or get medicine or to the dentist for a cleaning is their health. Keeping them healthy is my gift to them.

I sit and shake my head at how spoiled this family of ours is. Two of our kids have not just one, but two beautiful homes with more clothes and toys and things than they need and then some.

All six of us have three meals a day and before our stomachs even rumble with hunger we are filled with snacks or drinks beyond necessity.

We can go to the doctor or the dentist and get medicine whenever we need without worry.

Our cars run and we fill them with gas whenever we need.

I could go on and on and on about the good things we have going that make doing chores and regular doctors visits blessings in comparison to some of the bigger world issues.

At the end of the day, these things matter.

Do my kids know that I love them?
Were their needs met?
Am I teaching them how to be a steward of their resources and things and teaching them the life skills they need {age-appropriately}?

If so, I am doing my job as parent.

There's another story on mean parenting, er, I mean teaching responsibility, over at Cribsheet today, too. Must be something in the air these days! Go take a peak.

Magic.

I have never understood the Santa thing. And part of that is just the way I was raised. It's not a part of me or my history.

So when I see crazed grown ups bending over backwards to make crazy, fantasy Santa things happen, I don't get it.

I'm not saying it's bad. It's just not for me.

I'm not sure what it was Saturday night that had me tell H as he bathed away the day that the Easter bunny was coming that night.

He stopped splashing and looked up with sparkles in his eyes.

"Really? Tonight?"

"Can I call him?"

I was baffled and whole heartedly confused. I was merely making a make believe statement and didn't even realize he knew what I meant.

So he called the Easter Bunny. {Yeah, I've got his digits.} And chatted away the better part of ten minutes while I laughed and watched magic unfold.

Internally I battled, oh I battled.

Because there's something for me and these holidays that are so much about Jesus and adding confusing make-believe characters doesn't feel right.

He finished his phone call and made sure to report to the Easter Bunny that he is a really great, nice boy {and he made sure to report that some of his friends, aren't}.

We wrote a note and left some carrots. And even I surprised myself by playing into and enjoying this sillyness.

In the morning, he was ecstatic to see what the Easter Bunny had left him and his brother and sisters. Jumping for joy and then hunting for his eggs.

And I laughed that I really make no sense. I don't do Santa, yet I do the Easter Bunny?

I still don't really know how I feel about it or if we'll do it all again that way. I want more talk about Jesus' rising from the dead and less about the colored eggs, the candy and the new swimsuits that the Easter Bunny sent in just the right sizes.

But....I got a glimpse and a little bit of understanding of why we adults do some of the silly things we do.

It's for that twinkle in their eyes and seeing them believe so innocently.

But mostly, I think it's for that magic.

Sixteen Months.

As of Saturday, she's sixteen months.

And let me tell you, sixteen months has never looked so good.

Easter Morning.

{Fresh tulips.}
{New growth.}

{Easter Eggs.}

{Deviled eggs}

{My littles.}

The sun in shining. The house smells delicious. My cousins have been here visiting all weekend and now we await the rest of our family and company for later this afternoon.

16 people here this afternoon and oh, do I love it.

It's a good day for all those reasons, yes.

And the reason for today, we don't forget, do you?

For Christ the Lord is risen today.

Which is what makes it a good day most of all.

He is Risen. And it is a good day.

Indeed.

Happy Easter!

Full of Joy.

My Henry, he says a lot of silly, funny, out of this world things. He does.

He makes me laugh each and every day.

He makes my life full of joy, from the 'morning kisses' he gives me to start each day to the silly songs he makes up to his crazy superhero tactics. The fact that he truly believes that he IS a superhero. He really is, full of joy.

He is almost four and my heart stretches and sobs at that. Four, already? Where, oh where, are our days going?


Some nights I wonder if I even spent enough time staring at him. I want to memorize each and every feature, each and every movement and statement as I did in the beginning when our days were just him and I.



In the end, it's one {of now many} reasons I blog. This is my way of remembering some of those things I would otherwise let slip through. It's my way of sharing with friends and family the milestones and daily, minut details.

All this to say, this week was no exception. H was full of great things to share with me as he learns and explores this world.

Tuesday afternoon

The scene: The kitchen table. He is drawing a family picture.

After asking me a series of questions about family members eye and hair color, he asks:

"Mama, what color is your hair?"

"Blonde."

"So is that the grey crayon?"

*******

And then again.

Thursday morning.

The scene: Kitchen counter. He notices the library movies ready to be returned.

He asked me about why we are returning them and not the books, why they are due, what renew means and then says:

"Or instead of that we can return the Batman movie and put it with all the grown up movies at the library so that no kids know where it is and when we come back it will be waiting for us."

Such a clever boy.

My almost four year old boy.

Who is loving. And trying on the patience. And silly. And so smart. Happy. And most of all my boy who just loves life and who shows me how to do a better job of that, too.

Everyone needs one of him. For if they had one, they too, would live a life like mine.

Full of joy.

This post is linked up to Conversations With My Kid over at Moms Without Blogs.