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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

On Doctors Appointments and Life Changes.

Today I had my annual physical at the doctors office. You know, the appointment where they weigh you, ask you a bazillion questions about your health, go over your history, remind you to take your vitamins and exercise and then try to pressure you into the flu shot.

It was nothing short of a miracle that I figured out how the afternoon logistics would work. I scheduled the appointment so long ago that when I scheduled it I didn't really think about how the timing would work with preschool pick up and M's bus, but in the end, thanks to the kindness of three, yes three, friends, it worked out.

It's no secret that one of my least favorite activities on this planet is blood draws. I had a sneaking suspicion that today they'd tell me they needed blood, I'd prepared myself and even knew that if they did, I would be ok.

So when my doctor told me today was the day for my diabetes and cholesterol screenings, I was brave.

{Brave is very relative here.}

When the lab tech came to get me first I requested to lay down while having the blood draw done.

{Dramatic? Not me. To my credit, my normal blood pressure is 90/60. The nurses always joke that if it were any lower, I'd be dead.}

Then, I instructed her that because my veins often start collapsing that she needed to use a small, butterfly needle.

{To which she smiled, said thanks and left the room. Surely to make a snide remark about me bossing her around.}

Finally, when she took only one vial of blood, I said; "Don't you need two?"

No. She said. I only need one.

{But I really think she wanted to jam another needle in me to make me stop telling her how to do her job.}

I am that patient.

Perhaps the best part of the appointment was while talking with my doctor. After she filled me in on the birth of her twins and asked about my year and my general health, she pulled out the health questionnaire I had filled out prior to the appointment.

"Before we go any further I just wanted to clarify something that has changed on your paperwork from the past."

Ok. Sure.

"Did you mean to check the box that your current partner is female?"

Umm, no.

Oops. {I am guessing that I was thinking the question was am I male or female? Right?}

We laughed and she told me that many things change after one has children so she wanted to make sure.

Things may have changed since I've had kids, but not that much.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG!! Iam laughing so hard right now!! that is just to funny!! You need some rest.. ha-ha.. Love,Love Love You.
Auntie Laurie

November 9, 2010 at 8:14 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

Ha! That's hilarious!

November 9, 2010 at 8:14 PM  
Blogger The Bishops said...

I am laughing out loud again over this! Thanks for sharing! :)

November 9, 2010 at 8:45 PM  
Anonymous Stacey said...

I really think this is one of the BEST stories I have heard ever!! However,I feel your pain! I did go in one year to find my usual Dr on leave only to be replaced by a strange guy! During my exam he asked "What do you do for a living?" When I responded I taught at a TINY school, St. Barts he coughed a little and said... "OH, my kids go there!!" Lucky for me I didn't teach his kids, and I never ran into him at school after that!

November 9, 2010 at 9:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHA So funny Samara!!!!!!!!! That is Hilarious! I wish I could've been a fly on the wall at that appt-I'm sure the look on your face was priceless.. hahaha too funny... love, Holly

November 9, 2010 at 9:57 PM  
Blogger Gina said...

Oh that is so funny!! I can't stop laughing! Glad you stood your ground on how you wanted the blood draw to go.

November 10, 2010 at 7:59 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

That is hilarious!

I feel you on the blood draw - nurses run in horror when they know they have to take blood from me! Darn veins, lol

November 10, 2010 at 8:12 AM  

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